January 8, 2015

Inappropriate Sexual Conduct

My dad abused us in ways that are difficult for me to talk about. He has committed multiple acts of abuse in the form of lewd and inappropriate sexual conduct in the presence of his children at home. Those who view the following post do so to their own discretion, and I recommend them to be over the age of 18.

My dad would touch Angie’s crotch in the presence of us kids, and he did so multiple times when my sisters and I were in the same room to witness it. When we first started living with my dad, and had every-other-weekend visits with our mom, there were instances where he would touch Angie inappropriately in front of us. When it first started happening (even before he had custody) I would turn a blind eye out of disgust and give him the benefit of the doubt. I kept telling myself, He doesn’t know we’re watching, and I'd keep hoping it were true. 

But whenever I saw him touching Angie there, I felt extremely uncomfortable, and I knew that after a couple years of it happening that my dad was completely aware of our consciousness to those actions. He wasn’t oblivious. Most of the time it was when we were all in the living room, sitting down to a movie or TV. I’d try to pretend like I didn’t see anything when I'd see him doing it... But knowing it wasn’t right, I ended up telling one of the DCFS workers involved in my mom’s visits. I’m not sure if the worker contacted my father, or what happened, but he stopped after that.

My dad also seemed to enjoy telling us sexual details of his sex life for his own enjoyment. One day, at the dining table, Dad was determined to tell my sisters and me what sex was like. In particular, how their (his and Angie’s) sex was. Angie was present in the beginning of the conversation, but left partway through, and that’s when my dad went into further detail. (To this day, I'm not sure if she left out of discomfort or if she felt it wasn't appropriate. I have always wondered.)

Due to the sickened feelings this discussion caused, my mind has blocked out much of what was said. As hard as I’ve tried, I remember hardly any of the exact commentary, because I was so disturbed by the entire thing. I remember that he was talking about how good it felt to have sex with Angie, and that having sex was an enjoyable experience filled with lots of pleasure. 


Sydney and Dani were so uncomfortable that I could see them physically squirm as he talked. Even as I write this, I can feel my stomach rising up my throat, making me want to vomit. He went on and on, and as usual when we asked him to stop, he only pushed further.

He didn’t go into explicit detail about his privates, but he talked about the pleasure sex brought in a way that made me feel like he was trying to make us picture him having sex. I remember him describing the tingly feeling that sex gives, and making strange comparisons to try to describe exactly what pleasures sex brings. He would specifically compare to experiences we could relate to, such as slipping into a hot bath. He told us that it's like stepping into a hot bath, "and your entire body starts tingling, and you don't want to get out because it feels so good." The connections he made, and the effort he put into forcing images and feelings into our minds made us feel dirty and sick to our stomachs. 

When we asked him to stop again, he said 'What? Don't tell me you girls don't need to know about this. Because you do.' And treated us as if we'd asked for this conversation, while we silently prayed for him to stop.

He wanted us to hear what he was saying and visualize their sex for reasons that I don't even want to imagine. To be honest, recently discovering that my dad admits to being aroused by 6 year olds and admits to having "a history of sexual contact with a child" only validates the disturbed feelings I already got from him.

Sydney and Dani confided in me that they felt utterly violated about the discussion. Multiple times, when he did these kinds of things, they expressed emotions of fear and physical nausea. They told me they felt uneasy about living with a man who seemed to have a continued desire to make us feel sexual discomfort. None of us could understand it.

I can't describe how difficult it is for me to recount these kinds of experiences I went through. For me to go back to those places of fear and disgust and disturbance.

I try to describe these memories with as much detail as possible because of the many people involved who deserve to know the truth. It's difficult to try to recount experiences that have caused trauma in my life only to have people tell me I am making something out of nothing, or that I'm making everything up. I am not doing either. These are memories of events that took place in my life, and I have the right to speak out about the life I endured with my father for three years at the side of my sisters, who lived with him for another year after I left. There is too much at stake for my sisters if they are put back in that harmful environment.


9 comments:

  1. Men who stand on street corners, opening up trench coats to reveal their nakedness, do so for the shock value. They LOVE to see the reactions on people's faces. Then later they get sexual gratification recalling the shock and horror of being violated in that manner.
    THIS is what your father is doing as well.

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  2. I've got to say that really just sucks you girls had to witness these things and be so uncomfortable around your father when he clearly and consciously knew what he was doing. Although sick and twisted his motives were, he's been to some limited treatments and without a doubt has served in LDS church callings where questions about moral judgement are sound and established since he had to oversee youth. Disgusts me what he does behind closed doors. I sure hope he was never one on one with any youth in the church but I hope the youth out there that he made uncomfortable or any strange advances upon come forward. In fact, I seem to recall some legal document where another bishop said he should not serve in any callings with the youth. Would the church really turn a blind eye to that or did Brian discredit that bishop in some way just like he supports discrediting Brittany, his ex-wife and anyone one else that calls him out with facts. Brian is not the victim and never was or will be.

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  3. People who say that your memories come from parental alienation attempts by your mom are grasping at pretty weak straws. Anyone who has ever experienced abuse recognizes it clearly from your descriptions. My heart goes out to you and your sisters.

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  4. This disgusting man needs to be reported to the church authorities immediately. He is a sexual predator. He is a danger to all children, No child should ever be alone with him. He is a sexual deviant. He will eventually act out his fantasies. Angie...if you read this, get out NOW! He will abuse your daughter Abby.

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  5. This is sexual abuse. Lewdness. My hope is that you girls can heal in safety and that Brian gets a prison sentence.

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  6. You reported this to DCSF and they did nothing!!!!!!!????? Corruption in the system. This needs to be reported right now to the supervisors of those workers...then go all the way to the top...the police etc. This is wrong! I want to vomit! A real creeper Brian Wolferts...you know you wanted to molest your girls...yet you knew that you would get into trouble...so you found ways to get your jollies without actually touching them...You are a sick sick person...disgusting!

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  7. The fact that Angie allowed this infront of you girls scares me. I don't believe she is protecting your youngest sister. There are severe legal penalties for that. She needs to leave him, but likely never will. Most abuse victims don't and Angie fits into that category. Angie is a statistic.

    :( Someday Abby will ask her WHY. "WHY DIDNT you leave?" "Why didn't you stop him from sexually abusing me?"
    A message to Angie Wolferts: You will probably never leave. You probably will stay, just to make a point and to stick it out with Brian because you made temple covenants. Please believe me, I was married to an abuser and he broke our covenants the first time he hit me. Brian has already cheated you and broken his covenant. You are also in a covenant with your child and you must put her first. Shame on you for covering up the abuse for him. It's not worth it. Like satan, brian will use you up then leave you. He WILL cheat on you if he hasn't already. He DOES look at porn. He DOES fantasize about having sex with children. If you stay, you're just as bad. If you KNOW he is touching Abby, my prayer is that you never get to see her again. Your job is to protect your child and when you married into the Wolferts family... it became your responsibility to say, "do not pet my crotch in front of the kids." "Do not talk about having sex with me, to them."

    Angie, reading this blog...it is clear that the girls love you. Take your daughter and RUN. Tell the police the truth. It is YOU, Angie, who can free the girls. Tell the truth.

    If the system tries to give that weasel custody of Abby then you run and find a shelter.
    You unknowingly married a pedifile. God isn't going to condemn you for walking away. If you stay, people will be forever questioning Abby about if her dad is touching her. He is guilty.

    To Angies family, help her leave before it gets worse.

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  8. Michelle, Brittany, Sydney, & Danielle, I am so sorry for all you have been through! Your in my thoughts & prayers everyday! Keep your girls safe Michelle & NEVER let him harm them again! As far as Brian goes, your a piece of shit, pervert, & controlling man, that IN MY OPINION should not be allowed around ANY children under the age of 18 or in my states case 17. Michelle keep those girls hidden & safe for as long as you can! I am glad you are being a wonderful mom & taking steps to insure their safety. Lots of love to you all from Leasburg Mo. Kimmi Wallis

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