April 13, 2016

Life Since They Were Found

I posted the following in my personal blog in a post titled "Life in General", and decided it would be applicable/good for Sydney and Dani's supporters to read. I invite you to follow my other blog if you so desire. Most of what I write here is factual, including hard evidence and testimony of our father's abuse that has never been heard in court. My other blog has been (and will continue to be) a place where I collect things that I appreciate and value: family, faith, fitness, lifestyle and inspiration. Sometimes I feel prompted or inclined to write about my family's plight, and yesterday was one of those times:

To tell you the truth, I stopped writing here because of some very harsh judgments and internet bullying. It was getting so horrible that anytime I posted something, I was ridiculed and jeered at by my dad and his supporters. I was also simultaneously being physically stalked and cyber-stalked by some of his supporters to the point where I hated going outside because I knew someone was parked watching me and keeping tabs on our cars. It was a difficult time, to say the least... but I'm back and here to stay.

It's a lot of work to keep up on my sister's blogFacebook page, and also run my own social media platforms while working multiple jobs, but I need to start focusing on my future. My future involves advocating for children's voices in the legal system, continuing to pursue a career in modeling and fitness, focusing on my husband and family, building my art business, and so much more. And much of my future starts here, with this blog. Today I'm writing about something you all know about. Except this time, I'm writing completely from my emotional aspect instead of mostly factual. I'm writing from a point of view that is raw, exposed, and real.

I don't know where to begin. Life has been insane, intense and incredible all at once. In 2015, the Dr. Phil show aired, I started my teaching and art business, married the love of my life, and took a few months off to breathe. It seemed that there was nothing more I could do legally except prepare and wait. I began to think that Sydney and Dani wouldn't be coming back until they were eighteen. There were still a few people set on stalking and accusing me (the Orem Police Dept. storming my wedding, for example), but for the most part life began to feel more normal than I'd ever expected it could. 

The third day of 2016 began very early and alarming, as my husband and I awoke to a call at 3 A.M. informing us that my sisters and mom had been found. A family member of someone they were staying with had made a call to the police. They ended up being right here in a neighboring city, Pleasant Grove. We sat outside the Orem Police Dept. where they were all being held, after having been mocked by the detective on the case in a very unprofessional and horrible way. He told me there was "no way" he would allow me to see them because "I could have visited them whenever I wanted to". He smirked at me when I told him DCFS needed to be involved, and the girls should not be interrogated (and whatever else he was doing) without an attorney or case worker present. So there we were, sitting in our car for hours outside the building where my mom and sisters were being detained. I called DCFS at about 5 A.M. to make sure they were aware of the situation. The sun rose while we waited, while my heart ached so bad wondering if they were O.K. and how they were being treated. It was time to keep fighting for my sisters.

My husband is Diabetic and we needed to go somewhere to grab food. As we ate, we received a call from the Spanish Fork Prison. It was my mom. It had been so long since I had heard her voice, I didn't recognize it at first. Then the tears came flooding down my face as I realized it was her. I cried in happiness and relief because she was back and alive. I also cried because of the injustices she was suffering. She was in prison, prison because she chose to protect her daughters (I now know that she chose to meet up with them after a month when they contacted her in August 2014).  Through the salty tears and stinging eyes, I heard her tell me that she loved me and that we could visit her. I turned to my husband and said in disbelief, "I get to see my mom. Today." I will never forget that moment.

So much happened in those first 24 hours. I still look back on it and can't believe it's not a crazy dream. Since then, we were able to bail my mom out and I was able to visit my sisters for the first time. They were at Slate Canyon, a juvenile prison, for nearly 90 days. It took nearly a month to set up our visitation, but we were able to see them multiple times during their stay and I'm grateful for that. There is much that happened between January and March, but it is painful to discuss. My sisters and I rode on a roller coaster of hope followed by crushing blows. Every time it seemed things were finally going right, the judge would make an order to bypass their protection. For example, on March 17th DCFS found abuse (for the second time) against our father. On March 18th, after promising my sisters repeatedly to let them speak to him in court, the judge simply wrote an order sending them back to Kansas. Our dad placed them in a program that harms children until they think and act a desired way (do some research on the Dorcy Pruter program if you're interested.) Sydney and Dani have been missing for over two weeks and in the hands of my dad and these people, and my mom and I have been utterly crushed by it.

There are many forms of trials. We all go through life dealing with and learning from consequences for our own decisions, and some of us suffer deeply due to other's decisions. My sisters and I have had to live through immense amounts of trials and pain due to someone else's decision. The thing that gets us through the most is our faith in Jesus Christ and the love and faith that our mother has instilled in us since we were very young. Sydney, Dani and I have deep testimonies rooted in the gospel of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. They are extremely spiritually, emotionally and mentally mature for their ages, and I look up to them so much.

I am so grateful for each one of you. My last Instagram post really pushed me to start blogging again, because I didn't realize how much all of you looked forward to seeing my "deeper" side of life and the things I am passionate about. Thank you for encouraging me! As I continue forward, I am excited to partner and collaborate with some wonderful people and reveal what the future holds.

xoxo
Brittany

3 comments:

  1. I did not see this until now. So heartfelt. I am sorry you are being so harassed. Thanks for being brave and posting.

    I have had to make this same distinction. "There are many forms of trials. We all go through life dealing with and learning from consequences for our own decisions, and some of us suffer deeply due to other's decisions. My sisters and I have had to live through immense amounts of trials and pain due to someone else's decision. "

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  2. Congrats on the TRO hearing. I listened to it. I believe it's clear now that the reason the girls ran away is due to abuse. You have abuse substantiated that the father committed. There is research that shows when children run away it's more often due to abuse - to date I don't find any research that supports - no mention of even one case "girls ran away bc mom brainwashed". It's mostly abuse and some other scattered issues that follow ie LGBT, pregnancy, poor grades in school.
    The fact they ran away and later contacted the mom and not the dad shows they trust the mom. Kids don't run to abusers. There is a reason the girls contacted the mom and not the dad. It's the emotional abuse of the father.
    Michelle is not PAS / coaching if there's an indication of abuse that a parent is committing, rather it's called protective parenting! Claims of PAS are really the fathers projecting - clearly he's the PAS if he's using lies and attempts to isolate and silence the girls (scary and abusive). If the father were the religious angel he portrays himself as, then it would be PAS. But he's indicated with emotional abuse. He's no angel. Be careful that his religiosity is likely not genuine, it's compensatory for his bad acts and used as his tool of deception. (Compensatory religiosity is actually common among child perpetrators). This is not rocket science. The courts and psychologists who miss these common traits of abusers (compensatory religiosity and projecting) ought to be ashamed, however... It appears as tho perhaps not as quickly as we would prefer, the truth IS coming to light - thanks to a more informed GAL.

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  3. No one deserves to suffer like you did. Don`t give up.

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