Brian's Abuse In Summary

First off, today the page views hit 90,000. How incredible! In only four months, this blog has been able to spread my sister's true story across the country (and even internationally). I wouldn't be where I am today without each one of you who has come to read this collection of my family's experiences. Thank you.

As I discussed in my last post, here is a summary of all the abuse that I've put on this blog thus far. It's taken me a while to get it together and put it in order of occurrence, which isn't organized entirely accurately since the majority of my father's abuse was continual throughout the years. (For example, the abuse listed under "After Custody Change" were things he had been doing before the custody change, too). I felt that it was important to refresh these posts, since there are so many facts and stories that have been forgotten with time. 

The list is long, but very informative. I recommend heading to each link for a complete description of abuse if there are any questions, since these are just summarized bullet points. Also, don't forget--there's a Documents tab, a Timeline, an About section, a Q&A tab (you can always comment with valid questions), a link to the Roby Report, the Custody Report, and a tab for the Random Memories.

Pre-Custody Change

-A very detailed list of the different ways our dad has abused us (from when we were toddlers til present day).

-The facts that show my dad is the alienator, and that my mom never tried to isolate us from him as he did to her. This one is a deep read, but I feel that it's definitely a post to bring back from the past since my dad continues to try and convince people that my mom is who he actually is.

-Our dad would repeatedly tell us about a naked woman attacking him to have sex with him on his mission in Brazil. He started telling us this story when we were 10, 5, and 6 years old. Sydney, Dani and I always got the feeling when he told it that he was getting some kind of sick thrill in telling us inappropriate things and forcing us to picture related images in our minds.

-My dad would often tell my sisters and me detailed and very graphic stories of crimes against women. These stories would terrify us and although we would ask him to stop, he took pleasure in making us uncomfortable and frightened.

Custody Change (May 2010)

Random Memory #12: Discussing Angie's Breasts

My dad (Brian Wolferts) discussed my stepmom's large breasts with all of us daughters. If this were to have happened just once, perhaps it could have been a very uncomfortable discussion that I could have tried to forget. But this happened multiple times, sometimes in front of Angie. These talks caused all three of us a huge amount of discomfort, agitation, and repulsion. 

One time he went on and on about her breasts in detail that I would definitely deem as "lurid" for over twenty minutes at the dinner table. I remember him talking about how much he loved to grab them and how it made their sex much more enjoyable. He seemed excited by our obvious discomfort and our disgust at the intimately detailed discussion. I was 16, Sydney was 12, and Dani was only 11. After that specific discussion, I remember how all three of us discussed that we felt disgusted by the way dad kept pressing images of them being sexual, no matter how many times we asked him to stop. He seemed to thoroughly enjoy watching our discomfort, and we recognized the look in his eyes well during those times.

I know I've repeated this over and over, but I still feel this way: writing out these Random Memories is not something I look forward to. It's a disturbing process to re-live all these experiences, but it's necessary for those coming across this case to see the full story. If you haven't done so, please read the 11 previous Random Memories.

Dr. Phil 2

I was contacted by a producer of Dr. Phil around the end of November. Among the things they assured me in order to get me to agree to be on the show were the promises that I wouldn't have to confront my dad, that he wouldn't know what I was saying to them, and that Dr. Phil was an advocate for children and would let me speak. 

Although they said all those things, I was initially very skeptical. I didn't believe they would follow through with their promises and didn't see how the show would be a positive resource or outlet (and definitely not a final solution) for helping me help my sisters be safe from our dad's abuse. After years of the court system failing me and my sisters, my sisters running in July 2014, and all the ways my dad has attempted to keep me silenced in court since then, and all the ways my dad and his supporters have tried to scare me into backing down, I was almost to the point where I didn't think there was anything that could do to help my family's situation. I was losing hope.

Around this time, a lot of people told me they thought it would be a good thing to go on the show. I had family and friends who had seen highlights of shows where Dr. Phil stood up for the child, and the producers continued to tell me the same thing: that he was going to let me speak. I was very hopeful for that, because I felt that if my dad and I were able to civilly talk without him interrupting me like he had always done, maybe we could be a step closer to finding a compromise; a resolution.

I made a deal with the producers that I would go on the show only if I didn't

Dr. Phil

In the end of November, I was approached by an interested producer of Dr. Phil’s with the possibility to be on his show. I was led to believe that the show was on my side, ready to help me defend myself and my sisters from an abusive home life with our dad. During the process of being asked questions about the situation, I wondered if it was a good idea to trust Dr. Phil or not. I decided that I felt (and still feel) that shining as bright a light as possible on my sister’s situation is the best chance of them being protected and everything being resolved. Between our dad’s extreme emotional abuse and alienation, the court officials shredding our trust and failing us, and thousands of people jumping on my situation and making angry judgments… those girls have been through quite enough. I decided to go for it.

I assumed that Dr. Phil would be a good way to get even more people aware of our problems. After I realized that they weren’t going to help us unless I faced my dad on camera in person, I almost refused because I knew the imminent trauma of being in the physical presence of my abuser who I was (and am) still recovering from living with. But I weighed the possible good that Dr. Phil could do for my sisters, and I decided it would be worth the risk of facing my dad for the first time in over a year. I decided it would be worth the trauma. I told myself that I could handle it, prepare for it, and get through it.

But no amount of hopeful thinking could prepare me for the trauma I experienced being in his presence again and feeling his anger emanating toward me from

Dad's Attempts At Alienation

My dad (Brian Wolferts) sought my total isolation from my mother and anyone in her life, hoping that I would discover for myself his idea that my mom (Michelle) was “mentally ill” and “damned.” It was obvious to me that he needed me to have as little time as possible with my mother in order to make his implanted ideas stick easier, because the reality of time with my mom was completely opposite to what he kept repeating about her.

He told me the only way that I would discover for myself that she's "mentally ill" is if I cut off every tie not only with mom, but with her family, her friends, anyone in any of my wards I’ve lived in, anyone from her work field or people she knows from the ward, etc. For me to even begin to know "what she’s done, and the kind of person she really is". Because “they’ll all defend her because she’s got them thinking she’s the victim.” He would also tell us that she wasn't a good mother, and didn't really love us because of the way she tried to destroy our relationship with him. I have endured countless hours of my dad railing and lecturing us about our mom about all these things and many, many more. Yet she never tried to alienate us from him like he claims. I find it absolutely mind-boggling how much he accuses her now of doing the exact things he has done my entire life. I'm thankful that his attempts to alienate me from my mom didn't work.

When I say his attempts to alienate me from her 'didn't work,' I mean that they didn't keep me from wanting a relationship with her. I'm very thankful for that. But I didn't survive his alienation attempts without being affected. Dad tried as hard as he could to make us hate our mom. He found every excuse possible to sneak my mother into every subject, whether it was suggesting how awful a driver she was to accusing her of being mentally unstable and unfit to raise us. He always spoke negatively about our mom to us, and it was apparent that our dad wanted us to hate her. He incessantly channeled rage and abhorrence at us in hopes that we would channel it to her--it was apparent to me that the end goal of his raging to us was to get to Mom. It seems he wanted us to blame her for our pain he was causing us. It hurt us to have him talking about her so horribly (and I think it hurts any child to hear any parent talking bad about the other).

We knew Dad was not telling the truth. My sisters and I lived with our mom for six years, then visited her for the remaining four, and we never heard a negative remark against my father from my mom, even when we cried to her about the scary things he was saying and doing. She was gentle and kind our whole lives. I knew that his attempts to make us believe something untrue about Mom were wrong. The bad things my dad kept trying to convince us Mom was doing were almost verbatim what he was doing and had been doing for years. 

It was easy to not internalize the falsehoods about my mom, because there was such a stark contrast between her true self and what Dad kept trying to make us believe about her. With that being said, though: there were times that it seemed that it would be so much easier to earn our dad's love and stop his attacks if we started hating her, but we knew it wasn't right to hate our mom, and we didn't want to! All of this constant negativity toward my mom that my dad openly fostered ever since they first separated brought us all immense internal pain. 

In my personal experience (and I know Sydney and Dani feel the same way) I didn't want to be a vessel that channeled my dad's hatred to our mom--or anyone else for that matter--and so I turned the hatred inward. It seemed like the solution at first, but it didn't take much time to wear on me. My self-esteem, my faith in my talents, my belief that I was a good person--all of that began to decay. I've thought a lot about it, and I think that my dad fosters the idea in all of the people he lives with that they somehow deserve the horrible treatment he inflicts upon them. Because people with little or no self-esteem don't fight back. 

What motivates him to do this?

Comment Left in Moderation 1/14/15

This comment was left on my blog in moderation, and I felt it deserved its own post to address it, in order to give any readers a chance to address it too.

First of all, my dad called me into his room when I was a teenager and blindsided me with this discussion of child pornography. It wasn't because I was "lumping him in with people who were doing such abhorrent things" (whatever that's supposed to mean?). It was only after he put his own self and my baby sister in an example of filming child pornography that I considered him to be on that level. He painted a picture of himself engaging in child pornography with my baby sister. He looked excited when he talked about it for 20 to 30 minutes with me, as his unwilling and extremely uncomfortable audience. As I said before, he acted like he was gloating as he told me about child pornography.

Pretend that your kid randomly gets called into the principal's office in school for no apparent reason. Once alone with your child, the principal says, "A ring of people who made child pornography was busted, right here in our state! And what's crazy is that these people have made thousands of videos of doing things to children, even in schools like ours! Do you know what child pornography is? You need to understand how it works. What happens is that adults take children as young as your 2 year old sister and perform sexual acts with them. Those adults can be my age. Can you even imagine someone like me doing something like that with your 2 year old sister? Sometimes, they hire other people to come in and do it. But sometimes, it's actually principals and their own students!"

If your child came home disturbed by this, would your response to them be, "Did you ever consider that he was trying to explain how severe child porn is, because you were lumping him in with people who were doing such abhorrent things, and he was perhaps concerned you considered him to be on that level?" Would you suggest that the principal "was simply trying to illustrate just how terrible pedophiles can be, and that he was not in that category?" 

No; you would consider him a twisted threat to your child and all children. You would immediately seek for him to be removed as principal.

Random Memory #11: Attracted to Cousin

One day when I was 17, my dad (Brian Wolferts) came into my bedroom.

     "So... your cousin Gideon."

     "Yeah?" I replied hesitantly. I couldn't imagine why Dad had suddenly come into my bedroom to randomly talk to me about my cousin from Washington who was two grades behind me in school.

     "Are you excited to see him at your mom's family reunion?"
    
     "Of course." I said. It was a no-brainer; I only saw him once a year at my Grandma's house when his family came to visit Utah. I was confused why my dad even asked.

     "Do you have a crush on Gideon?"

     "What?!"

     "Do you have a THING for him?"

     "Ew, NO!" My mouth dropped open and I was completely disgusted.

     "A lot of people have an attraction to their cousins. It's completely normal. I had a thing with my cousin, you know. It lasted a while. I would get really excited to see her when family reunions were scheduled. We would sneak off together and stuff. I even kissed her a couple times." He was talking about his female cousin on Omi's (his mom's) side of the family. His eyes gleamed in the strangest way while he told me this. I can still remember how excited he looked. It grosses me out so much to recall it... it even makes me nauseous. "It's okay Brittany, you can tell me how you really feel about him. It's normal."

     "Dad! I do NOT have "a THING" for Gideon!" I remember my horror at the thought of my dad kissing his cousin and sneaking off with her. Has he told anyone before? Did their parents know? I thought. Why is he telling me this? Seeing the look in his eyes, I knew he was telling me for the pure enjoyment of my discomfort and shock.

     "Well, I just wanted to tell you that it's perfectly natural if you do."

With that, he abruptly left my room while I sat there gaping in shock.

Random Memory #10: Complete Disturbance

As I stated in my previous post, some of these memories are so difficult to write about. They give me a knot in my stomach and a lump in my throat. But when my dad made a public outcry to thousands of people to help him find my sisters back in August, I made a decision to speak out about the abuse, discomfort, fear, and everything else that we endured. It wouldn't be fair to those involved in the situation, fair to my sisters (who have needed a voice for far too long), nor would it be right to keep all these things silent. I feel that withholding the truth would be an act of dishonesty in and of itself. 

My dad often made me feel highly uncomfortable in ways that were hard to pinpoint exactly--ways that brought a creepy feeling of disgust. Sometimes he would look me up and down and comment about how he felt certain clothing items complemented my body. One time I got a new pair of jeans for school. When I got home he asked me to show him and Angie the pants, and when I did, he talked about the way my jeans hugged my hips and thighs. "Whoa, Brittany," He said, "I didn’t know you had hips. Those jeans really show them off. You shouldn’t wear those anywhere, they’ll make boys think bad thoughts." 

He would look at my body in a way that made me feel like he was undressing me with his eyes and made me highly uncomfortable. I immediately felt that I couldn’t wear those jeans around him, because he would stare at my hips and butt. After that, Angie wouldn't allow me to wear those jeans again... She seemed upset at what he said, and I didn't understand why.

My dad constantly told me I was 'putting bad thoughts in boys' minds,' whether it was the kind of bra I wore to my choice of pants. (And I feel the need to add that I was one of the most modest-dressed girls at school. You can ask any of my high school friends.) It didn't seem to matter what I wore or what I did--I was putting naughty thoughts in men's mind. That had an absolutely disturbing effect on me and the way I perceived myself. To this day, I can't decide what is worse--feeling like my dad wanted to see through my clothes or feeling like I was constantly walking porn to other boys.

Inappropriate Sexual Conduct

My dad abused us in ways that are difficult for me to talk about. He has committed multiple acts of abuse in the form of lewd and inappropriate sexual conduct in the presence of his children at home. Those who view the following post do so to their own discretion, and I recommend them to be over the age of 18.

My dad would touch Angie’s crotch in the presence of us kids, and he did so multiple times when my sisters and I were in the same room to witness it. When we first started living with my dad, and had every-other-weekend visits with our mom, there were instances where he would touch Angie inappropriately in front of us. When it first started happening (even before he had custody) I would turn a blind eye out of disgust and give him the benefit of the doubt. I kept telling myself, He doesn’t know we’re watching, and I'd keep hoping it were true. 

But whenever I saw him touching Angie there, I felt extremely uncomfortable, and I knew that after a couple years of it happening that my dad was completely aware of our consciousness to those actions. He wasn’t oblivious. Most of the time it was when we were all in the living room, sitting down to a movie or TV. I’d try to pretend like I didn’t see anything when I'd see him doing it... But knowing it wasn’t right, I ended up telling one of the DCFS workers involved in my mom’s visits. I’m not sure if the worker contacted my father, or what happened, but he stopped after that.

My dad also seemed to enjoy telling us sexual details of his sex life for his own enjoyment. One day, at the dining table, Dad was determined to tell my sisters and me what sex was like. In particular, how their (his and Angie’s) sex was. Angie was present in the beginning of the conversation, but left partway through, and that’s when my dad went into further detail. (To this day, I'm not sure if she left out of discomfort or if she felt it wasn't appropriate. I have always wondered.)

Due to the sickened feelings this discussion caused, my mind has blocked out much of what was said. As hard as I’ve tried, I remember hardly any of the exact commentary, because I was so disturbed by the entire thing. I remember that he was talking about how good it felt to have sex with Angie, and that having sex was an enjoyable experience filled with lots of pleasure. 

Sydney and Dani were so uncomfortable that I could see them physically squirm as he talked. Even as I write this, I can feel my stomach rising up my throat, making me want to vomit. He went on and on, and as usual when we asked him to stop, he only pushed further.

He didn’t go into explicit detail about his privates, but he talked about the pleasure sex brought in a way that made me feel like he was trying to make us picture him having sex. I remember him describing the tingly feeling that sex gives, and making strange comparisons to try to describe exactly what pleasures sex brings. He would specifically compare to experiences we could relate to, such as slipping into a hot bath. He told us that it's like stepping into a hot bath, "and your entire body starts tingling, and you don't want to get out because it feels so good." The connections he made, and the effort he put into forcing images and feelings into our minds made us feel dirty and sick to our stomachs. 

When we asked him to stop again, he said 'What? Don't tell me you girls don't need to know about this. Because you do.' And treated us as if we'd asked for this conversation, while we silently prayed for him to stop.

He wanted us to hear what he was saying and visualize their sex for reasons that I don't even want to imagine. To be honest, recently discovering that my dad admits to being aroused by 6 year olds and admits to having "a history of sexual contact with a child" only validates the disturbed feelings I already got from him.

Sydney and Dani confided in me that they felt utterly violated about the discussion. Multiple times, when he did these kinds of things, they expressed emotions of fear and physical nausea. They told me they felt uneasy about living with a man who seemed to have a continued desire to make us feel sexual discomfort. None of us could understand it.

I can't describe how difficult it is for me to recount these kinds of experiences I went through. For me to go back to those places of fear and disgust and disturbance.

I try to describe these memories with as much detail as possible because of the many people involved who deserve to know the truth. It's difficult to try to recount experiences that have caused trauma in my life only to have people tell me I am making something out of nothing, or that I'm making everything up. I am not doing either. These are memories of events that took place in my life, and I have the right to speak out about the life I endured with my father for three years at the side of my sisters, who lived with him for another year after I left. There is too much at stake for my sisters if they are put back in that harmful environment.

What Most People Don't Realize

I have seen speculations that I haven't been following the proper legal channels in trying to get my sisters heard. I have also seen speculations that my dad is supportive of getting my sister's voices heard. Both are false, and this post will explain why.

My dad seeks for Sydney and Dani to stay in hiding so he can continue to look like a persecuted victim to others. My sister's silence helps him spin his chosen narrative about them being brainwashed as they hide. He knows I've been telling the truth about him. What his supporters don't seem to know is that he is the kind of guy who can get angry at his own three-month-old (my sister Sydney) and throw her by the leg across the room. What does he care if the girls who dared tell on him have an inconvenient time while hiding from him?

He could have quietly faced us in court and avoided all public exposure of his abuse. Instead, he has chosen to use the system like a tool: delay and lie to make taking him on in court almost financially impossible. He has been using earnest people to verbally abuse my sisters and I so that he doesn't have to publicly expose his own abusive nature. A couple examples of how I know this: he doesn't discourage anyone from being nasty to me or from stalking me. He encourages stalker-like strangers to continue to search for Syd and Dani to be returned to him.

I am going to continue to speak up about what my sisters ran from while he forces them to remain hidden. He first forced them to run by avoiding facing them in court on a technicality, by fighting to get their TRO vacated, and by twice moving to remove their appointment of their own GAL. Those are facts. He fought from the start to get them returned to his house behind closed doors after they dared tell on him. Since they ran, he has also forced them to remain hidden by failing to offer them safe asylum, by failing to move the court to order them a safe living situation while proper authorities hear them, and by currently fighting to have my petition on appeal dismissed on another lame technicality. 

Focus

Some of you may have been following the strange and confusing antics happening on Facebook this week. Yesterday "Mel Bittner" re-opened the Facebook Cause page called 'Missing Wolferts girls - finding the answers.'. A brief description of this woman's role, for those who feel they are in the dark in this:

As soon as my family's situation became public back in August, "Mel" pretended to be one of my biggest supporters.  She gained my trust to help with my Facebook page, and informed me to stay away from the page to 'legally protect' myself. I believed and trusted her. In early November, she suddenly hijacked it from me and my uncle, removed all other admins, and shut it down just before openly supporting my father. Her lies, threats, misrepresentations, and disrespectful behavior are repellent to reasonable people, which is her aim. I am deeply saddened by the confusion being created by those like "Mel" who want to distract me and others who want to support the girls.

Please remember that all strange and confusing behaviors on social media are designed for three purposes:

• To create doubt about my integrity
• To deflect focus away from admitted pedophile Brian Wolferts (my father) by allowing him to hide behind other's excuses for him
• To cause me to lose focus on my desire to protect my younger sisters

I am not losing focus. I am still determined to get my sisters the help they need to be officially protected. I can still close my eyes and remember the look on their faces as they begged me to leave when I reached legal adulthood, so I could help them escape my father's abuse. I was the first one out of the three of us to have a voice legally for the first time in our lives. I am going to continue to speak the truth.

John 8:32 "And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free."

My Sisters

For a while, I've wanted to dedicate a post to Sydney and Dani, my little sisters who aren't so little anymore. I think that there couldn't be a better time than the Holidays to do this. I'm going to write about who these girls are: their hobbies, their dreams, their goals, their fears. I'm going to write about them in a way that will portray them as the remarkable young women they are, instead of mere faces plastered to a flyer.

Syd is the second oldest to myself. She has a remarkable ability to round up people around her. She has a sense of genius sarcasm, and uses it in such a way that never offends her peers, but brings them together in many hours of fun and laughter. Syd also has a gentle, caring side to her which she uses to bring the spirit of peace into the lives of those she associates with. She has a marvelous poetic gift, and expresses herself through writing when she can. She has a high sense of fashion. She is absolutely gorgeous naturally, and I believe it is because you can see straight through to her stunning inner beauty as well as outer. Sydney has an exceptionally strong testimony. She may outwardly seem shy to some, but she is fierce in defending what is right. She has an innate sense of wisdom for her age--she has always seen a deeper side to life. She has always been great at making close friends that last, and she chooses those select people carefully.

Dani is the younger sister of the two. I can't believe how fast she is growing up. Dani's developed into a fine young lady, with amazing homemaking skills. She's better than me in the kitchen... and I've just learned to accept that! Even at her young age, I can see wonderful hints of what an outstanding mother she will be. She is also the family 'techy.' If Syd or I don't know how to work a new item, we'll call for Dani. Dani possesses this amazing ability to love all mankind. She's not naive: she exercises her love with caution. But she could fill all of the Pacific Ocean with her tender care. She loves people, as I do, and I could see her becoming a great many things in adulthood. Dani possesses a kind soul unlike any other, and she is constantly looking for ways to serve others, even within the walls of her own home. She has a gift for making many friends wherever she goes.

All of my sisters have a great sense of humor (that I just didn't seem to inherit) and outstanding artistic abilities. I'm so pleased that we all share the love of art together: it's a similar interest that binds us. They/we also love music and have all been blessed to have had a mother who was able to teach us piano when we were young. I can't wait to see what each of my sisters become in their lives. I love them so much. Syd and Dani are so different, yet so alike. They are smart girls. They are able to assess and understand situations way beyond what most kids their age could. They have experienced so much pain at such young ages, and yet they have risen above it and become stronger through it. I know they have yearned to be heard for so long.

You won't hear any of this from my dad's followers, because they don't know these amazing girls. They don't know that Sydney has a phobia of cold feet, and they don't know that Dani used to hate any food that was green. They don't know that Sydney wants to be an engineer, and Dani secretly wants to be an actress.

Dad's supporters don't know the hours I've spent trying to calm Sydney as she sobbed from the pain my dad caused her from feeding her gluten and emotionally shredding her through endless abusive lectures, all the while trying to hold back my own tears as I tell her that, "One day this will be over," even though I didn't see a way it would end. They don't know the years I watched Dani fight to hold in all the pain to appear strong, yet collapsing on the inside until she began falling into depression (which she had to keep from our dad who demanded we appear happy at all times).

Dad's supporters don't know how many tears my sisters have shed alone, because

Custody Evaluator's Report Part II

A continuation of the first custody evaluator post.

According to the report, the custody evaluator, Dr. Blakelock, spoke on the phone with Dr. Dettenmeier, who had evaluated my mom almost three years before in April 2007. She told him that Mom had "coached the children in her efforts to alienate them from their father." She further stated that "Michelle lacked positivity and was 'vehement' towards Brian." Blakelock wrote, "Michelle's parental interference escalated beyond her immediate family as she negatively influenced extended family, friends, counselors, neighbors, spiritual leaders, etc. by sharing with these individuals Brian's therapy progress notes, Dr. Roby's complete psychosexual assessment report . . . ."

Despite Dr. Dettenmeier's conclusion that my mom had coached us, my Mom still was granted primary custody of us at that time. She was our primary custodial parent from 2004 until 2011. It was this report by Blakelock that resulted in my dad getting custody. 

Basically, Dr. Blakelock found my dad to be less abusive than my mom, despite her "coaching" stemming from her legitimate NEED to warn us to be careful around our dad who admits to multiple instances of sexual behavior toward children. Yet I had NO knowledge of any of these details until I found this report this week. All my mom ever wanted was for my dad to get the help he desperately needs for his severe problems, and to keep us protected from his impulses that have put children at risk.

So, my dad entered into sex offender treatment voluntarily, and did it for 18 months. Yet these three men "questioned the appropriateness of his treatment":

1. Dr. Ririe (psychosexual therapist who was hand-picked by special master Sandra Dredge to be Dad's therapist after she lied and said that Dr. Roby no longer wished to be my dad's therapist, which he refuted in an affidavit, btw);
2. Dr. Jay Jensen (who owns and runs ACAFS, the company who gets assigned by the special master to be the go-between between parties in acrimonious divorces, and who also conducted conjoint therapy for the Wolferts family);
3. Dr. Blakelock (custody evaluator).

Blakelock found my dad's 2005 abuse finding by DCFS to be inconsequential. My dad's multiple admissions of sexual behavior toward young children didn't seem to matter at all to Dr. Blakelock. 

My sisters and I have been betrayed by the officials who were supposed to protect us. 

A personal note to all those mothers out there who are fiercely defending my dad and seeking that my mom be prosecuted to "the full extent of the law" for protecting my sisters in hiding: if your children had been spending every other weekend with a father who had engaged in multiple instances of sexual behavior toward children in the past, and admitted to it well into his adulthood with children of his own at home, of course you would seek to get supervised visitation for him in order to protect your young daughters! Of course you would seek to warn them to be careful about not being alone with him, especially if the courts let your request for supervised visits drag on for over two years. Of course you would seek to protect them after the courts failed to listen to their accounts of abuse at his hands over the last FOUR YEARS of living with him primarily. 

I do not believe that any mother who loved her children would not be protective of them under the said circumstances. My mom was being preventative and warned us to be careful of anyone tried to invade our safety zone and touch us. Despite all these things she knew my dad had done--again, things that I never knew until very recently--and despite the way my dad treated us, she always encouraged us to see the good in him. That is a fact. I am a witness to it, and I know Syd and Dani will testify of the same fact when they are back, because we all lived through it.

Custody Evaluator's Report

This is the document from my parents' divorce, that my dad apparently doesn't want you to see, even though it's the document that gave my dad custody of us. It's the document that shows WHY my mom was found to have "coached" us. I had not seen this document, nor had I heard of this document or the revelations about my dad, until this past week when I discovered it. Reading it makes me feel like I'm going to be sick.
 

The above screen shot from the report states: "Brian's infidelity and questions regarding any risk he might pose to his three daughters were major concerns of Michelle. These concerns led to a brief attempt at marriage counseling through LDS Social Services, individual and conjoint therapy with psychologist Dr. Sheffield from March 2004 through July 17, 2004, and extended individual and conjoint therapy with Dr. Hyde. Dr. Hyde, who was providing couples counseling referred Brian to Dr. C.Y. Roby for a phsychosexual assessment and eventually referral [sic] to Dr. Roby for treatment of his inappropriate sexual behavior. Brian entered into sex offender treatment with Dr. Roby and a therapist by the name of Cox. Dr. Ririe, Dr. Jensen, and this evaluator questioned the appropriateness of this treatment, which was designed to treat sex offenders though Brian voluntarily participated in this treatment for approximately 18 months." (emphasis added)

Dr. Blakelock also stated the following:

"In taking his second polygraph, Brian admits to a history of sexual contact with a child during his adolescence for which he was neither investigated nor charged with a crime." 

"Brian also admits that at the age of 23 he exposed himself to two young girls as he exited a shower, and that 'years later' he masturbated to thoughts of the older girl (11 or 12 at the time of the incident) by placing her in the position of the younger girl (6 or 7 at the time of the incident)."

Despite all this, Dr. Blakelock favored my dad even though the ethical guidelines he quoted clearly indicate that he shouldn't have! Instead, Dr. Blakelock excused my father's behavior and justified his decision to send three innocent young girls to live in my father's house full-time, with unsupervised visits.

Blakelock stated his "opinion is that Brian poses little or no threat to sexually assault his daughters" because of:
a) the significant length of the time since Brian's sexual contact with a child;
b) Brian's demonstrated control over any deviant arousal he may have experienced;
c) the fact that other responsible adults have been informed of his sexual history; and
d) that his daughters are of such an age where they are fully capable of reporting any inappropriate sexual behaviors on the part of Brian should they occur.

Direct Message To My Dad

I have provided much documentation to supporters (both mine and yours) to back up my statements and give as accurate a picture as I possibly can of what we are going through and what happened in the past to get us to this point. I've seen countless people use the fact Mom lost custody to support you. It seems to me that all they've seen from you is the published Appellate Court decision that can be found online.

I ask you to provide us all with the Child Custody Settlement Conference Report from 2010 that was used to determine that Mom coached us and that you should be awarded custody. It is time to see exactly what it is that Mom coached us about that was so egregious to lose custody. 

You've led your supporters to believe Mom is capable of brainwashing us, and you have influenced so many of your followers to want her prosecuted for possibly hiding with Syd and Dani and "emotionally abusing" them.

If you are in the right, you should have no reason to fear immediately producing that document for the public to see.

Thank you.

Brittany

Random Memory #8: Naked Woman On Dad's Mission

My dad told this story to us countless times. It seemed to be a favorite story of his. Sydney, Dani and I always got the feeling when he told it that he was getting some kind of sick thrill in telling us inappropriate things and forcing us to picture related images in our minds.

Dad says this happened to him on his LDS mission, and he would tell it to us regularly since we were 10, 6 and 5 years old. My dad claimed that one day he was separated and alone from his missionary companion. (Everyone knows mission companions are supposed to be together always, and not ever be alone). 

Dad told us that he went into his apartment, where there was a beautiful Brazilian woman waiting to get him alone. He would tell us how this woman undressed in front of him until she was completely naked, tempting him. He told us that the beautiful naked woman "jumped on top of him and attacked him" when he tried to escape. He liked to say it took him a "long time to fight her off" and that "it was really hard to do because she was so attractive," but that he eventually resisted and "got away."

My dad told us that he came home from his mission early 'honorably.' From a young girl's perspective, I was always confused as to why he kept telling us this story and why he was sent home early, if he didn't have sexual relations with the Brazilian lady he spoke of. I don't recall him ever telling us the story around Angie or my mom. 

The obscene details of this story are hardly something a parent should describe to a child once, let alone repeat multiple times over the years to one’s very young daughters. I wish I could forget it.

Photo credit: www.ethanrwilkinson.com

Another Response To A Tweet

People who don't know my mom call her crazy. People who DO know my mom call her just the opposite. Everyone who knows my mom calls her loving, kind, rational, smart, and supportive. Multiple therapists have examined her and found her to not be crazy, and to be mentally sound. My sisters were examined in June before they were forced to run away, and the psychologist Dr. Hyde currently attests that it would be harmful to my sisters to be removed from our mother's custody. All three of us know that our mother is not abusive.

People who don't know my father call him loving and kind. People who live with him behind closed doors, under his authority, know that he is not. All three of his daughters who are old enough to articulate detailed accounts of his abuse agree that our father is abusive. He is consistently abusive. He is chronically abusive. He seems to be unwilling to change how abusive he is, despite his admitted years of investigations into his abuse. 

A Great Blog Post

The following is a great blog post at the Equality Time blog that addresses a comment made this week by my dad's ardent supporter, Aaron Allred. Aaron is the founder and trustee of my dad's trust fund set up to help him fight me and my sisters in court where we seek protection from his abuse. His comment was incorporated into the blog Aaron created this week to support my father even further, by filling that blog with multiple allegations that I am a kidnapper and a liar, and that my supporters are as well. 

Having never spoken to Aaron Allred, or heard any comments or questions from him directly about my situation, I am not sure how he feels he can come forward with such statements that are misinformed and completely false.

Response To A Tweet

My dad's supporters tweeted this on Friday, December 12, 2014: "mother loses custody girls go missing."

Mom lost custody of us four years ago. I think it's pretty lame to continue to try to paint this urgent situation as a mom losing custody and suddenly taking off with her children. If my mom had wanted to take the girls and run, she would have done so six years ago when she first sought to protect my sisters after we complained about his abuse, and after she had found the Roby Report which revealed my dad's psychosexual therapist recommended supervised visitation was safest for my sisters and me. It was obvious my mom wasn't trying to remove my dad's rights, because she always encouraged a SAFE relationship with our father from the moment she discovered (too late) that her children may be at risk without supervised visits with our dad.

Shame on all those who keep suggesting that my mom has kidnapped my sisters. My sisters were not kidnapped. They ran away, only after their safety was removed when the court dropped their temporary restraining order and delayed their day in court. The restraining order and a court date to determine a safer place to live were the only protections that stood between my sisters and our father, whom they had just accused of abuse.

If my mom is with my sisters, I know that it is because she legally has the right, and morally has the obligation, to protect her children from known abuse. I know that my father is abusive. My sisters and mother know that he is abusive. Our family therapist who knows Dad knows that he is abusive. Now we need the court to give us the chance to say why, officially, in court.

Where Is My Mom?

I've been getting a lot of questions and concern about the whereabouts of my mom, in addition to much speculation from supporters on both sides about whether or not I am worried about my mom who is also missing.

I hope that she is safe in a shelter where she and my sisters can remain free from abuse. As I have said before, I have never felt safer than when my sisters and I lived in a shelter with Mom. I want to believe my sisters have found a good shelter to live in until they can emerge once the courts have established official, permanent safety for them. I hope that they asked my mom to be with them to protect them until the court grants them official safety. I simply don't know where they are; I assume they kept me in the dark about their plans in order to protect me.

I hope and pray that the court hears our pleas and helps my sisters. I will keep trying to help them get heard. To do this, I need your help financially because it is expensive trying to get the courts to listen.